Thursday, December 10, 2009

13 weeks

While we're not exactly in the second trimester, we can see it from the doorstep, so to speak.  We're staring down it's barrel? It's right around the corner? It's coming around the mountain? Whatever! I'm almost there! 
I saw my midwife who was very pleasant.  She is the mother of twin girls, now aged 22.  She delivered them vaginally.  She said that I have a higher chance of vaginal delivery because our twins are fraternal.  That's nice to hear, but I'm not making any plans.  I'm open to whatever needs to happen, I think.  Our next appointment is with Dr. R in about 4 weeks when we will hopefully find out the genders of moo and foo.  They have new names every few days.  This is fun for me.
Something comedic happened to me while we were having breakfast with friends mid road trip.  These friends are very special to us especially because they are our trusted source for all  information pregnancy and parenting.  They have a 7 month old.  My favorite piece of advice so far: Forget the organic onsies.  Totally.  
Oh yeah, so what happened to me...we were having a totally normal and calm conversation in the restaurant about the ups and downs of cloth diapering when my friend uttered a statement like, "at first, you're changing so many diapers and laundry is impossible...".  With that, a switch flipped in my brain and a sense of sheer and unadulterated terror came over me.  Twins!!!??? Laundry???!!! I won't be able to do it!!!! It's too late!!!! Who the hell thought we should have babies??!! I began to tremble.  My heart was pounding.  My lip began to quiver.  My arms were not attached to my body.  My eyes welled up and I said, "I'm terrified!!!!", which I was at the moment.  The crew was very supportive. Emotional me had to make an instant decision: buck up or fall out on the restaurant floor.  I chose to buck up.  I realized later that I had a genuine, if very brief, panic attack, which I feel lucky to say I've never had before.  Pure fear.  I have not had the feeling since, but I would not be too surprised if it happened again once or twice before these two arrive.  I can see it happening at my work baby shower, or when we set up the nursery.  Way too real. 
After that, and after our trip, I went into full on planning mode.  Lists within lists.  I feel like we don't have much time.  Only about 5 or 6 months.  I've been in a stupor for the past 3 months and they passed in a blur, so will the next 5, I have to assume.  
In retrospect, the mini panic attack feels like a right of passage.  Ceremonial.  It sparked something in me.  

5 comments:

  1. I think it sparked the H...S..! You're really going to have two munchkins! {hugs all around} The good thing is that you have two arms and two people to care for them. You'll do great!

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  2. As the parent of a 7 month old as well, I have to say I disagree about the organic onesies. Here are some of my favs:

    kate quinn organics
    speesees
    even gerber makes organic onesies cheap at Target online!

    Cloth diapers rock too! My favs are the happy heiney snaps one size. 25 per babe and you'll be set! Wash em every third day, it's a snap, seriously.

    For disposibles, Nature Babycare on Amazon, 37 bucks a case delivered right to your door, no tax, no shipping and biodegradable at that. And they REALLY work!

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  3. You are going to do great! I always say twins is totally doable.. you can still get out and about on your own which is so important. Just imagine triplets.. now there's another story all together. I was like you though when I was pregnant... I prepared myself for an extremely hectic and sleep deprived existence and I was pleasantly surprised. Is there a diaper service you can use instead of washing your own? That would be a ton of extra work. We used pampers from the beginning... they really are a modern marvel. Just picturing our "little" pile of pampers in a landfill somewhere makes me feel extremely guilty but you can only do what you can do.

    congrats on the 2nd tri milestone!!! I love seeing your updates!

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  4. Cloth diapes are fun! I'm lovng not having to buy diapers. Yes there's more laundry, but what's one more load with 4 people in the house. I went the cheap route-prefolds and covers and few fitteds thrown in bunch. I did pick up 3 pockets at a consignment sale and I do like them, but love the prefolds for sure!

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  5. I've got a bunch of diaper wraps and stuff that I'll send you for the cost of shipping--if you're interested, we can talk.

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